Change

Have you ever had one of those days where you can feel everything changing. I'm not the type of person that does well with change, especially in certain areas. It's funny though because everything is changing - every second, minute, and hour you can guarantee that something is happening. Some change is good in our narrow minded eyes, some change is bad or even may seem horrible, and some change may not make any difference at all.... Today is one of those days, where all my simple human brain can think on is the bad change, or I guess I should say - what I view is bad... I kind of wrestle with the fact though that if my amazing Creator is always trying to get me to where He wants me, if He is always working on my behalf to make me a better person, a person more in love with Him. Why can't my mind just accept the "bad change"for what it ultimately will end up being - good change.

I've gone without a lot of things in my life, lost a lot of people along the way that I really cared for (and still managed to live without them), and have had a lot of hurt happen - but I look at where I am now and I have to know and remember that I could not possibly be here if it weren't for God orchestrating my life the way He has.

So today is one of those days, but I will also keep in mind today that it doesn't matter what happens, who is in my life, what I have to lose - As long as I have Christ, and as long as He is moving my life into the direction He wants it, I will rejoice in His name.

Learning from others

Learning as we go/people watching. 

I have always been intrigued by people and the way they work, I guess you could say. I have always been the “people watcher” type of person. I’m not sure what draws me to want to know more about how people are, what they think, how they may think differently than me, how they act & react and etc. I think there is a little more to it than just that though, I feel like it’s a part of some sort of natural learning technique that we all have, perhaps some use it more than others. 

Being in the age group that I’m in but also being married and having two children gives me a wide spectrum of ages to learn from. I have the parent-friends that are older than I, who are raising teenagers or possibly younger children. Then I have the group that is in my age range, who are just starting out, fresh out of college and just married. Then I also have the much older group – Their children are out of high school and college and most often want company and are willing and eager to teach what they have learned in their years. What a pool of people to pull knowledge from eh? 

It has been most interesting lately to really watch how parents are parenting their children/teenagers. It is kind of frightening to me to think that in all too little of time, I will be there myself. I feel like I need to soak in as much as I can now, learn as much as I can so I can be fully prepared. Yes, I am learning from God’s word too, don’t worry… However we are put here to learn from one another and I have definitely been doing just that. 

Here are the lessons I have learned thus far …

!) Don’t expect an undisciplined child to be disciplined! – Discipline and do what works for your child.

2) BE CONSISTENT – Don’t be wishy washy, changing your “rules” every other day. Talk about confusing a child. 

3) Do both of these in love.

4) Watch my actions/patterns/habits – Whatever I do, my children will learn to do FROM ME also… Scary at times to think on….

5) Seek Godly counsel when I fail, because I surely will fail at times.

6) Check myself and my heart to make sure I am doing everything I am supposed to be doing as a parent. 

Some great Scripture

Proverbs 13:24, Hebrews 12:11

Proverbs 22:6, Ephesians 6:4

Proverbs 29:15, Proverbs 23:13-15

Quotes & Scriptures

1 Timothy 1:15-16
This saying is trustworthy and deserving of full acceptance: "Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners" - and I am the worst of them. But I received mercy for this reason, so that in me, the worst of them, Christ Jesus might demonstrate His extraordinary patience as an example to those who would believe in Him for eternal life.

Psalm 34:18
The Lord is near the brokenhearted; He saves those crushed in spirit.

Ephesians 6:10-11
Be strong in the Lord and the power of His might. Put on the whole armor of God, that you may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil.

"Worship is our greatest weapon of warfare. When we praise God in the midst of an enemy onslaught, his attack is weakened and he must FLEE!"

2 Timothy 1:7
For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.

1 Peter 2:16
As God's slaves, live as freee people, but don't use your freedom as a way to conceal evil.

"We can look at the walls that have been erected around us to keep us from moving into our destiny, and they may seem impenetrable and impossible. But when we listen to God, do what He says, and lift up powerful praise to Him, the walls will come down. And they will come down completely!"

2 Timothy 4:18
The Lord will deliver me from every evil work and preserve me for His heavenly kingdom. To Him be glory forever and ever.

Titus 2:14
He gave Himself for us to redeem us from all lawlessness and to cleanse for Himself a people for His own possession, eager to do good works.

James 1:15
Then after desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin, and when sin is fully grown, it gives birth to death.

2 Corinthians 4:18
So we do not focus on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.

Matthew 13:44
The kingdom of Heaven is like treasure buried in a field, that a man found and reburied. Then in his joy he goes and sells everything he has and buys that field!

James 5:16
Therefore confess your sins to one another and pray for one another so that you may be healed. The effective prayer of a righteous man can accomplish.

Galatians 6:7
Do not be deceived, God is not mocked; for whatever a man sows, that he will also reap.

Proverbs 4:23
 Guard your heart above all else, for it determines the course of your life.
 
2 Corinthians 4:8-10
We are afflicted in every way, but not crushed; perplexed, but not driven to despair; persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed; always carrying in the body the death of Jesus so that the life of Jesus may also be manifested in our bodies.

Hebrews 4:15
For we do not have a High Priest who cannot sympathize with our weakness, but was in all points tempted as we are, yet without sin

1 Peter 5:10
 Now the God of all grace, who called you to His eternal glory in Christ Jesus, will personally restore, establish, strengthen, and support you after you have suffered a little.

"A great many things in God's divine providences do not look to the eye like goodness. But faith sits down before mysteries such as these, and says, "The Lord is good, therefore all that He does must be good no matter how it looks. I can't wait for His explanations."


Romans 8:13
 For if you live according to the flesh you will die; but if by the Spirit you put to death the deeds of the body, you will live.


"Great is Thy faithfulness, Great is Thy faithfulness
Morning by morning new mercies I see.
All I have needed Thy hand hath provided;
Great is Thy faithfulness, Lord, unto me!"


Isaiah 41:10
  So do not fear, for I am with you;
do not be dismayed, for I am your God.
I will strengthen you and help you;
I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.


"I would rather be what God chose to make me than the most glorious creature that I could think of; for to have been thought about, born in God's thought, and then made by God, is the dearest, grandest, and most precious thing in all thinking." - George Macdonald


 "They took away what should have been my eyes, (But I remembered Milton's Paradise) They took away what should have been my ears (Beethoven came and wiped away my tears) They took away what should have been my tongue (But I had talked with God when I was young) He would not let them take away my soul, Possessing that, I still possess the whole." -Helen Keller

Philippians 4:7
And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.
 
Isaiah 6 - Full Chapter ... ;)

"Let God's promises shine on your problems!" ~ Corrie Ten Boom

Ezekiel 1:28
Like the appearance of a rainbow in a cloud on a rainy day, so was the appearance of the brightness all around it. This was the appearance of the likeness of the glory of the Lord.

"Ministry is kinda like drugs (great thing for a pastor to say huh?) You're never gunna get high unless you try it, and you're never gunna get hooked unless you get high."

"We do not always suffer because we are unrighteous, but suffering always produces deeper righteousness in those who embrace it!"

Romans 7:20-25 ~ Now if I do what I do not want to do, it is no longer I who do it, but it is sin living in me that does it. So I find this law at work: When I want to do good, evil is right there with me. For in my inner being I delight n God's law; but I see another law at work in the members of my body, waging war against the law of my mind and making me a prisoner of the law of sin at work within my members. What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body of death? Thanks be to God-- through Jesus Christ our Lord! So then, I myself in my mind am a slave to God's law but in the sinful nature a slave to the law of sin.


"You always feel ashamed that someone could be that important, that without them, you feel like nothing. noone will ever understand how much it hurts, you feel hopeless, like nothing can save you. and when its over and its gone, you almost wish you could have all that bad stuff back so you could have the good."

"One day justice will come and find you
And I'll be right there in your memory to remind you."

(More 2 Come!!!)  :D

God and His Coolness

Galatians 6:7

Do not be deceived, God is not mocked; for whatever a man sows, that he will also reap.

The Truth: If we sow a Godly action, we will reap a Godly blessing. If we sow an ungodly action, we reap Godly discipline or judgment. 

I love this verse and am thankful, especially recently that God is just. It seems as though the world and the flesh never stop trying to pull you under, the devil is always so thorough in his attacks to try and make you quit. I am thankful that in having a heart that wants to follow him, even though sometimes it is hard to keep focused on this side of it, we will be blessed for our Godly decisions and be eternally rewarded. It is most often what keeps me going! Our God is so gracious to even think about us while we are here on earth and He does. It’s so comforting to remember that in our striving, God see’s us – He knows our struggle between right and wrong. He knows that He created us with a free will. And in that He is always trying to make us a better people, a people that love Him more and desire to know Him in the most intimate of ways, He shows mercy and justice when needed. Throughout all of my life, I can think of several occurrences that where if justice hadn’t of been served, if I wasn’t disciplined for my wrongs – I would still be stuck in that same ol’ rut today. I would be the same destructive Hollie and there would be no change for the better. I can also think of times where, especially in the past couple of years; I have chosen to do right, follow and obey God and have seen the amazing outcome of those choices. God is true to His promise’s, He is faithful to love us in the truest way.

I will forever be thankful for this promise, and I will most definitely from here on out always strive to make the best possible choices and decisions. My heart so longs to know Him more and to serve Him in every aspect of my life. I want to know Him just as He knows me, which yeah that may be impossible because He is God. I picture it though and I pray for it because knowing Him just as little as I do now has most definitely been the most amazing experience in my lifetime. Honestly.

love, joy, and happiness...

You're a rainbow after the rain

Splash of color on a dull and dark day

A glimpse of hope that promise's aren't always broke

You brighten up my life, In ways that seem to say

You have a purpose and are loved always

Although you may not always see the rainbow after the rain

You know it's there waiting to awe and amaze

You are my rainbow on SO many days.

Life, yeah, a little rough sometimes...

Being “brave” sucks ….Being “strong” sucks too…. Being “courageous” yep that one is no fun either…

So then, if all of these things suck so bad and if sometimes being these things mean some of the most painful times in your life; why exactly do we be them? 

We do them because we care. We do them because no one else has the heart to do them.  Who knows maybe some people do them because it’s just what they are driven to do…

Some people have patience, some people have structure, and some may have impeccable timing, or have some kind of action that they’re good at… Mine happens to be love/passion. Let me tell you, that sucks too most of the time. 

I open my heart to things that normal people wouldn’t open their hearts too. I allow myself to feel to the fullest instead of living as if being hurt is going to kill me. What’s wrong with a little hurt now and again anyways? I love and I feel, and I am passionate in those two things together. Perhaps a downfall some may say. We are called to guard our hearts, so am I doing something wrong? I don’t think so, not when the people and things that you love are the things that God has intentionally called you to love and be a part of. Not when those things or people are a tool to get you to where He wants you to be spiritually and then maybe even in return, you’re being used as a tool as well…

Funny how life works sometimes, you never really think about the amazing things that come from doing the most horrid and scary things. In that scary moment all you can think of is; why and what, who and when, this and that… You make yourself crazy, overthinking and asking every possible question you could ask. Then when you get to the end and things are way better than you could have ever imagined them to be, when things seem so amazingly perfect that you can’t even remember all of the bad that happened along the way – you finally get it… 

That aha moment. The big picture God was begging you to be patient for all along the way. Pretty much insisting that you trust and that you have faith. He is patient as He drills this into our heads and He lets us mess up without even counting how many times we do. He molds our minds and hearts and makes us the things He needs us to be, and yeah, it may cause a little pain in the process. Isn’t it so very worth it in the end though? Yeah, I think it very much is. 

He is so worth it and in the end, even if things didn’t turn out to be amazing. If I am doing what He wants, I will be content or at least; I will try my very hardest to be!

2 Corinthians 9:8 And God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that in all things at all times, having all that you need, you will abound in every good work.

1 Timothy 6:6 But godliness with contentment is great gain.

2 Corinthians 12:9-10

But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong. 

Philippians 2:3-5 

Do nothing from rivalry or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus,

musings.

Can't explain this feeling

So completely amazing, hopelessly revealing

so lost in it

Attracted to a haze, it's fiery warm blaze

It's going on inside my heart

so lost in it

I can't control it, becoming one & a part

It's sewing itself to me, becoming such a beautiful design

different pieces that makes the pattern complete

Beautifully mixing, emotions that intertwine

so lost in it....

{Unfinished}

Life - So Not Easy - That's Ok Though.

Who are we, as a people who love God? We waltz through life, expecting life to be a piece of cake and wanting everything to be easy. Smooth sailing is something that we are sold on a daily basis, so that is what we should expect, yea? What the world says goes - the example that we follow and model our lives after? False truth people and such a bold lie, it is in blatant opposition to what the entire BIBLE teaches!

Did Jesus have it easy? Did He Float through His life and it was smooth sailing, everything just honky dory & dandy? No, He didn't. He came and He suffered, He came & endured, He came and He agonized and then He died...
Jesus knew that He was going to have it rough, He knew that His journey  would be far from easy. And He did it anyways. He loves us, He loved those then, and He loved His Father and wanted to bring Glory and honor to His holy name... No matter how hard He knew the journey would be. He came and He endured...

So what gives me, what gives us the right to ever think that we being a people of God should have it easy!? We shouldn't and we definitely don't deserve it, and it mostly never is - it doesn't matter what the world tries to sell! It's deception; it's a load of crap.
I have been so wrapped up and wanting to give up, just because things are a little rough... Everything seems like it's falling apart, nothing seems "easy" right now & you know what, it isn't and that is ok!!!
Do you want to know why it is ok? Because, I’m not doing it alone, God is walking on this journey with me. Not only that, His word gives promise after promise that God is on my side. He is working all things together for MY good; He has plans for my future and to prosper me. He wants to give me His joy & He wants me to live in His peace!!! He promises that He will help us endure; He will hold us up and keep us accountable... He also makes it clear that in our weakness, He is made stronger and in that He is strong we are also strong...
Wow, how great is our God? How much our God loves us and cares. How awesome it is that our God sympathizes with us in our uneasy lives. I would say, that is One pretty AWESOME God.

Isaiah 41:10

Romans 8:31

Jeremiah 29:11

Romans 8:28

Ps 90:10 The length of our days is seventy years--or eighty, if we have the strength;

 yet their span is but trouble and sorrow, for they quickly pass, and we fly away.

He preserves and restores.

The harsh wind is cold against my cheek, falling teardrops freeze in place

The distance is far and this road less traveled seems an impossible journey on days as today. 

My mind wages war and the wounds that pierce my heart are sore. 

I am weak and yet, I am also strong. A noble goal can never take too long. 

Though no one may follow and I often feel alone, I must press on. 

Some may think me insane or perhaps an extremist if you may

The hope that gets me through each passing day

There is always light at the end of each journey and it happens to be THE light. 

His glorious face and His gentle hand. It touches and warms, soothes and protects. 

His hands hold me up, keep me standing tall and tough. He loves and saves, gives unending grace. 

The road is rocky, the uphill climb seems often too steep. I always keep in mind

His love - It is never ending and always gives what is needed to endure.

Something I will always journey for, cherish, and keep.

Actions that can speak.

Tears are not silent
One teardrop screams a thousand words.
Broken down, empty handed, and heart on sleeve
These tears are not silent.

Tears are not silent
But a few can utter a cluster of unspoken thoughts
Beaten down and perhaps abandoned
These teardrops are not silent

Her teardrops are there and don't you see them?
I hear them cry out, her teardrops are not silent.

Her teardrops pour, can you please catch them for her?
They're hitting her cheek, staining perfection, Her teardrops are not silent.

Forgiveness: Everyone needs it

Forgiveness

Matthew 6: 14-15 for if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.   (In red, Jesus words)

I would say that this is fair warning on what God thinks about forgiveness of others. I personally believe that the reason God would say this, that He would NOT forgive someone who could not forgive someone else because He wants us to realize that we aren’t any better than the person who needs forgiveness. I also believe that when we forgive someone we understand what forgiveness is – a true act of letting go of the hurt, pain, rejection, or whatever happened that caused forgiveness to be needed. When we understand what forgiveness is, we understand fully what Christ’s forgiveness is and has done. 

Also, I have noticed/heard a lot of people say lately that they can’t forgive someone UNLESS there is an apology… I didn’t notice that in the verse above, it doesn’t state “you must receive an apology and THEN forgive. NO, It says – FORGIVE OR He will NOT forgive you. Wow, let me think about that one for a whole half second… I think I may have changed my mind. 

This is just one verse in the Bible… There are a ton of Bible verses on forgiveness. I think if people realized just how bad they actually were, they wouldn’t be so surprised when someone else wronged them. I am a horrible person, I don’t deserve to be forgiven by Christ or anyone for that matter, but because HE DID forgive me, I think others should be able to too… He is CHRIST after all! If Jesus can forgive us, why can’t we forgive each other!? Don’t you agree that the world would be a WHOLE lot BETTER if we all just realized – Oh hey, you aren’t perfect either, THANK GOODNESS!!!!!!!! 

Never easy, yet, it’s ALWAYS worth it… I have found this to be true every single time.

Next time you ask God to forgive you, Maybe you should ask yourself; Have I forgiven those who wronged me today? ~

A girl who always needs forgiveness and Is always learning to forgive